The other day I was at that delicious, first-rate dining establishment called Steak n’ Shake. While sipping my peanut butter banana milkshake and chowing down on my to-die-for cheese fries, I happened to look up and quite nearly spit the food right out of my mouth. A girl about my age was walking by wearing nothing but a t-shirt and underwear. No pants to speak of. She was just walking casually to her table. No shame, and no pants.
I soon realized that it wasn’t underwear she was showing for the world to see, but a rainbow-colored bathing suit. I ask you: What is the difference between underwear and a bathing suit bottom?
Nothing. Except perhaps one is made of cotton, and the other some kind of stretchy spandex material.
Here’s another question: If that is the case, why on earth would it be acceptable to wear only a bathing suit bottom (read: spandex underwear) in public?
Oh wait, its NOT. (My stance on swimwear in general is another topic entirely.)
Here is my theory:
What is wrong with the world is not socialist government, liberal media, loose morals, social injustice, a downward spiraling economy or any other topic older people enjoy heated debates about.
What is wrong with the world is that people no longer dress like they have class.
I’ve been obsessed with the TV show Mad Men, lately. I always tell myself I will watch one episode before bedtime, but it usually ends at 2 a.m. three or more episodes later. I just can’t get over how well everyone dressed in the ‘60s.
Look at the picture above. Clothes are tailored, heels an acceptable height, cleavage and buttocks covered. Men are wearing either ties or collared shirts. Socks match slacks, and hair is perfectly coiffed.
Even if their morals are (extremely) loose, their dress gives the appearance of class. Sure, being classy through and through is best, but if you aren’t classy, at least try to look the part.
I’ve come to view history this way: Things were better “back then” because dressing up and looking presentable was normal. Only after people started wearing sweatpants in public and baring their underthings for the world to see did culture, the economy and all other things start to turn south. (I may be making this up, but in my opinion it has at least a little grain of truth.) Therefore, the root of all the world’s problems is that people no longer dress like they have class.
If everyone looked presentable for the sake of looking presentable again, the economy may well fix itself. How? The power of fashion and class, my friends. Social injustice might disappear. People will start buying and selling houses again. Inflation will go away.
If this was 1960, the underwear girl at Steak n’ Shake would have been shooed out the door rather than given service. She would think to herself gee, if I want food, I better go buy an appropriate outfit. Buying said outfit would boost our GDP. After coming back to Steak n’ Shake fully clothed, her purchase of a hamburger would further serve to boost the GDP.
And you said fashion couldn’t fix the world’s problems. Friends, let’s do the country–no, the world–a favor. Dress with class and confidence. It just might bail Spain out of bankruptcy.
Une fille doit être deux choses: chic et fabuleuse – Coco Chanel,